Happy International Talk Like A Pirate Day mateys! If you're gonna walk around talking like a pirate, you might as well have a few bad, I mean good pirate jokes to throw out there right?

Here are a few I've pirated, but if you want more sail on over to piratejokes.net.

Q - Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
A - Because they can spend years at C!

Q - What did the pirate say when his wooden leg got stuck in the freezer?
A - Shiver me timbers!

Q - What kind of grades did the pirate get in school?
A - HIGH SEAS!

Q - Why do young pirates always fail when saying the alphabet in kindergarten?
A - Because their fathers insist that there are seven Cs!!!!

Q - What do you get when you teach pirates how to sing?
A - Harrrr-mony!

Q - What is a pirate's least favorite vegetable?
A - Leeks!

Q - What is a pirate's favorite Internet sensation?
A - Planking!!!

Q - What does a pirate do when he's too wasted to get back to his ship?
A - He uses his ayePhone to call Uberrrrr.

A pirate goes to the doctor to get the moles checked on his back. The doctor says, "There's nothing to worry about, they're benign."

The pirate looks at him surprised and says... "Shiver me timbers! When I spied them in me looking glass this morning, there be only 3!